Agent Gardiner
by the little spanko
Summary: WARNING: SPANKING - Gardiner gets deaged back to his young teen years, Carlos and Kiera have to both cover it up and care for him. - WARNING: SPANKING
1. Chapter 1

Notes/Warnings: Takes off from S2E8 and goes AU.

Spoilers: Seasons 1 & 2, especially S2E8 - but I don't think it'd be anything that'd ruin the show completely for you

"_He needs an attitude adjustment."_ I remember Carlos saying that to Kiera and Dillon after I left the meeting. I was barely in earshot when he said it, but I have better than average hearing and I doubt he knew that I'd heard him. I'd just bullied my way onto their task force again and had rather bluntly threatened Kiera with accusations. At the time, his remark made me chuckle. Not anymore.

Over the next few weeks I worked closely with Kiera, trying to figure out her connection with Liber8, a new terrorist group, and prove her guilt, all while using her to try and stop them. I'd been so certain of a connection, and I was right - just not in the way I'd originally anticipated. Our partnership was an uneasy one for her, but I enjoyed the game. Liked watching her squirm. ...if I'd known she really was a good guy it might of been different. But, then again, who the hell could ever of predicted time traveling?

I think it'd be easier to start the day I got shot. Kiera sent me out on what was actually an important clue. She thought of it as busy work to get me out of her hair; I don't know, maybe she knew it'd be useful. I went to a small local law firm; they'd been doing some illegal paperwork related to our case - I can't really go into it, case pending - I worked my way up to the man in charge. I demanded he get me some files, and while he was out I texted Kiera, gave her my location and an update. Next thing I know, our suspect is rushing at me with a gun….

"Gardiner."

It's Kiera's voice. My eyes don't want to open. God, it's cold. Colder than cold.

"Gardiner, can you hear me?"

She sounds worried. She says something else, but it's muffled. I can hear other voices. Everything is blurred and the lights are too bright, it hurts my eyes.

"C'mon buddy."

That's Carlos' voice. Why the hell is he calling me buddy? One of the last times we spoke I threatened him.

My eyes can finally make out blobs and I squint towards the blob that I'm pretty sure is Carlos.

"There he is," Carlos says in an encouraging voice. "You ok?" He pats my arm. The touch feels so warm. I can't believe how cold I am.

"Freezing," I tell him. My teeth start chattering after I speak, or maybe they'd been chattering the entire time.

Something warm is wrapped around me, I figure from the smell of leather that it's a jacket. The blob that looks like Carlos helps me into a sitting position. Something fluffy and warm is wrapped around me, over the jacket. I cringe, every inch of me is waking up and is in pain. That's when I realize I'm on a table. I'm about to ask why when the Carlos blob wraps his arms around me and pulls me to his chest. I try to push away, but I don't have the strength. I realize I can feel my legs and feet again, and then wonder why I couldn't feel them before.

"We need to get your temperature back up," he tells me, and he starts briskly rubbing my arms and back to get my circulation going.

Carlos seems so much bigger than before, but I've never been this close to him and my vision is still fucked up. My head feels so heavy, I can't help but lean against him.

I come to again, I feel much warmer. I don't know how long I was out, but I immediately remember that I'm leaning against Carlos. He's still working on getting my circulation going. A good amount of time passes with me leaning into him, but I have no idea how long. I must have fallen into a frozen pond and gotten hypothermia, I don't remember being near a pond. I don't remember much of anything. None of this makes any sense. I hate it when things don't make sense.

"What the hell happened?"

"We lost you for awhile there," Kiera tells me, "we got there just in time." In typical Kiera fashion, she stops talking after not really telling me anything at all.

"Tell me what happened," I bark at her. Why does she always have to be so vague? Answer a fucking question directly, Kiera.

Carlos stops the rubbing, puts his hand on the back of my neck and gives it a squeeze and the slightest of shakes. I know it's meant as a warning, but the day I start taking orders from a detective...

My visions snaps back into place. Everyone is…._is everyone bigger?_

"What the hell happened?" What the fuck? This can't be my eyes. Am I smaller?

"Calm down," Carlos orders. He gives me a stern look and is right in my face. The guy is huge. "You've been through a lot, try and stay calm," he tells me much more gently. He goes back to the rubbing.

I feel my pulse even out.

"Okay," I say. My voice quivers, but I don't care. This is all really freaky, and my body is still cold.

"Okay," Carlos mimics, he gives me a reassuring grin. It calms me.

I look around and don't recognize where I'm at. There are computers everywhere, slick and expensive furnishings - but, it's all in what looks like a warehouse. The whackjob witness from the bombing is there, the one who says he's a time traveler, and so is the Alec Sadler kid.

"Where are we?" Everyone but Carlos flinches at the question. Now we're getting somewhere.

"That's not important," Kiera says.

"I think it _is _important," I tell her. Anything that makes her squirm is definitely important. I hear Carlos sigh at me, but I ignore him and stare Kiera down.

"This is my place," Alec says. "I work here."

I look around again, this is way too elaborate for him to afford. Someone big is funding this kid.

"Why are we here?" This time everyone squirms.

I then remember the suspect coming at me with a gun. I start to look down at myself, but Carlos catches my chin in his hand. It's such a shocking gesture for a man to do to another man that I can't help but stare at him dumbly.

"Hey buddy," there it is again, _buddy._ What the hell is going on? "we've got some things to talk about."

"I'll say," I tell him as I yank my chin out of his hand. I don't feel quite as vulnerable as before.

Carlos gives me a momentary irritated look and then he seems to catch himself. I don't like the look of pity on his face, but maybe I can use it to my advantage. I start to look down at myself again, and again he reaches out to stop me. I duck him and try to slap his hand away.

"Knock it off," I yell at him.

He cants his head to the side in irritation and says "I'm trying to help you." Carlos is a little scary when he's mad, but I'm sure I am, too.

"I don't need your help," I growl back. That's when I notice my voice doesn't sound right. The bass and grit are both gone. I realize that maybe there really isn't anything wrong with my eyes. I look down before he can grab hold of me and see blood splattered clothes that are too big. My clothes. That's right, I remember the suspect aiming at me, I heard the pop of his gun before I could get one off. Holy shit. I got shot. Why didn't they take me to a hospital? Why are my clothes too big? ….these are...yea, these are my clothes.

"What's happening?" My voice cracks, like it did during puberty. Oh god. I look down again, and Carlos turns me towards him and puts a hand on each of my shoulders.

"We're not sure," Carlos finally says.

"What the fuck do you mean you're not sure?" I need a mirror. "Where's a mirror?" I try to slide off the table, but Carlos is right in front of me, holding me in place.

"Try to stay calm."

"Get the hell off me!" I try to push him off with all my strength, but he doesn't budge. I need to see my face in a mirror.

"Ohhh….ohhh, I did my part, it's time for me to go," the whackjob witness says and runs up the stairs. We all pause to watch him go. He's completely insane.

"You need to calm down," Carlos tells me in a soothing voice as he wraps a big hand around each of my wrists to keep me still. Nobody is moving to get me a mirror. No one's telling me a goddamn thing. I've had enough - I kick Carlos in the knee, and he doubles over on top of me.

"Gardiner, you little shit!" Kiera yells. She's behind me on the other side of the table and she reaches for me; I try to squirm away from under Carlos.

I'm halfway off the table when Carlos grabs me by my left arm and pulls me to him. In that instant, my trousers, with fastened belt and all, hit the floor. My body is much slimmer now. I catch my boxers with my free hand around mid thigh, but it's impossible to hike them back up with only one free arm. I'm standing and I see that I'm a good four inches shorter than before. At least.

I look up at Carlos. He's towering over me and he's pissed. He looks down at my predicament and gets a satisfied look on his face. I'm spun around and tucked under his left arm. I yell "Don't!" I grew up in the 60s and 70s, I know where this is going and I'm not about to just let it happen. He wants to pop me one on the chin? Okay. But not this. Before he lands one I try to kick him again, but he's ready and moves.

"You keep making this worse," he tells me. I feel the back of my suit jacket get pushed up, and then my dress shirt. I try again to hike up my boxers, but he pulls them free of my hand and I feel them land at my ankles. Carlos tucks my right arm under my stomach and out of the way. I look up at Kiera, and she folds her arms and gives me a satisfied smirk. I feel my face burn in shame and then remember Alec. He's getting a perfect view behind me.

"Ah!" The first swat lands, and I realize my pain tolerance is shot to shit from whatever happened to me. "Ow!" That one makes my eyes sting. I try twisting away, but the next swat doesn't fall.

"Are you gonna do that again?"

"Is someone gonna tell me what the hell happened to me?" That might not be the wisest response, but I need to know. I grit my teeth and wait.

"Gardiner," Carlos says in a warning voice. "C'mon now, you've been through enough for one day. Answer my question, okay?"

"I won't as long as you tell me what the hell is happening."

He chuckles. "Good enough."

I'm released and I stand up, my shirt and jacket fall back in place. Both are just long enough to cover me.

"I think I have something that'll fit him," Alec says. I turn to look at him and he nods in a friendly way.

I look back at Carlos as Alec walks off. "Well?" I ask him.

"You were shot," he tells me.

"I remember," I say.

"...and you sort of …. you died."

I look at him, expecting him to go on. "That doesn't explain any of this."

"You're going to need to have an open mind about this…"

"I survived death and I came back shrunk," I tell him, I can't help the sarcasm in my voice, "I think my mind's been opened."

"You remember what I told you in the apartment?" Kiera asks me.

I try not to roll my eyes. "About you being a time traveler?"

"I wasn't lying."

That can't be true. That doesn't make any sense. ...but then, what's happened to me doesn't make any sense - or, at least what I _think _happened to me. I don't say anything.

"I'm not the bad guy," she says, and it irritates me because that doesn't explain what happened to me either.

"_What happened to me?_"

Kiera stops and looks at me, her and Carlos have a silent conversation of facial expressions in which he urges her to do something she's unsure of. I begin to feel weak and look for a chair. My body just isn't acting normal.

"Whoa, I got ya," Carlos has me back on the table so fast that it makes my head spin.

"Do you have any water?" I ask. I suddenly feel like I'm dying of thirst.

Kiera nods and walks away.

"Do I need a hospital?" I ask Carlos.

"I don't know," he says. "Do you want me to take you?"

I shrug. I don't remember ever being this thirsty before, as though I might actually die from thirst.

Kiera is back with water, Carlos helps me sit up and drink it. I empty the glass quickly.

"I should've brought a pitcher," Kiera jokes to Carlos, and she's off with the glass again.

"How did this happen?" I ask him, and my voice sounds so small and pathetic. That's when I realize I'm close to tears. Carlos pulls me to his chest and wraps his arms around me again. He feels so warm, and I can feel the muscles under his shirt, and I feel safe here.

My breathing starts to even out when Kiera returns, she gives us a significant look as Carlos takes the glass from her. Fuck her. Carlos helps steady my hand while I drink. I finish all but about a third of it, then feel a bit queasy. Kiera takes the glass and walks off again after a look from Carlos.

"We found you dead. Kiera has a chip in her or something and can talk to Alec through it…" I look up at Carlos with what I guess is a bewildered look. "I know, it's crazy - you'll get used to it. Jason was here," Carlos nods at the stairs so that I know he means the whackjob, "and said that he could fix you so we brought you here."

"This is _not _fixed." I look over myself to emphasize that fact.

"Well, you're alive," Carlos chuckles. "Anyway, they've got this orange segmented metal thing, and - I don't understand it. One minute you were dead. They did a thing with it and the computer, and now you're like this."

Orange segmented metal thing? "What did they use?"

"I think these'll fit you," Alec says, handing me a pair of boxers, jeans, a tee shirt and a hoodie.

"Thanks." I'm in nothing from the waist down but socks, so I don't think twice about pulling on the boxers. I try to get off the table, but Carlos stops me.

"I don't trust ya to stand," he says, "let me help you."

And he does. He's so strong that he moves me easily. We get the boxers and jeans on before Kiera comes back. The jeans are a little long, but other than that they fit great. They're the black skinny jeans kids are wearing these days, and I'm not sure how I feel about that. I'm closing in on fifty, after all - or was.

I'm sitting on a duvet on the table, and I wrap it around my legs while Carlos starts to pull off my suit jacket. My body temperature is almost back to normal, but I'm still chilly.

I look down at myself when he gets my undershirt off. I'm surprised that I'm not covered in blood. My clothes are, but I'm clean. One more thing that makes no sense. I hold back a chuckle. It's been a good ten years since I've seen ribs or muscles. If anything good has come out of this it's losing the gut. I pull on the teeshirt and follow it with the hoodie. Both are dark grey and soft from multiple washings.

Alec holds out a mirror for me, and I reach out to grab it. Carlos grabs my hand.

"This is gonna be hard to take," he tells me.

"I kind of figured that out." I try to tug my hand free but can't. He huffs and then lets go. I grab the mirror and pull it to my chest, then look at Carlos. I can feel my hand shaking and I'm scared as hell. Carlos nods me on. I look into the mirror…


	2. Chapter 2

I can't believe what I'm looking at. It's me. It's me at around fourteen years old. This can't be real.

"This can't be real." I feel my stomach flop and the room spins. My heart is hammering away in my chest. I see sparkles around the edges of my vision. "This can't be real!"

"Okay," Carlos takes the mirror from me. "It's okay." I try to fight him, but he grabs my hands in his much bigger ones and wraps me up in his arms. I try to wiggle free but he puts my head under his chin and shushes me.

This is when it occurs to me that Carlos is odd. If Kiera didn't hate me so much I'd expect this from her. But from another guy? No. Thinking about this helps me calm down. So does the fact that Carlos is rocking me. ...so does the possibilities of what this might mean. I try not to get excited, especially at this age.

"How did this happen?" My question is muffled because Carlos won't let me pull my face from his shoulder.

"Jason theorized that since the device could be used to go back in time that it could also be used with the same effect on the human body," Alec tells me. I finally pull away to look at him directly.

"The problem was that there was no way of knowing how far back it'd send your body."

"Why didn't you just use it for a split second?" I ask.

Alec gives me a meek smile and shrugs, "We gave you the shortest dose of the device possible."

"Am I stuck this way?" What's going to happen to me if I am?

Alec furrows his brow, "Well…"

"Can't you just do it for the same amount of time the other way? That'd get me to the right age, wouldn't it?"

"I don't know."

"_You don't know?_" I yell. Carlos shushes me again and goes back to cradling me.

His ministrations work. I feel my muscles relax. I can't help it, it's calming.

"I mean, theoretically yes it would. I just don't know how to do it."

"But the crazy guy does?"

"The device can be used to travel ahead in time," Alec says.

I look at him, my mind turning. It has to work both ways. We just need the little crazy guy, Jason.

"Where's Jason?" Everyone just stares at me. "Let's go get Jason. Who knows where he lives?"

"I think he's homeless," Alec tells me.

Kiera gives me a strange look, and I know she isn't telling me something. "Where does he live?" I ask her, and I can't quite contain the hatred from sneaking into my voice.

"You heard Alec," she says coolly. "He's homeless."

"Don't you fucking lie to me!" I yell, and I try to pull away from Carlos so that I can slide off the table. I want to get in her face. He just grips me tighter, and his right hand, which had been running up and down my spine since I freaked out with the mirror, slides down and pats my ass. I doubt anyone else sees this, but I know exactly what it means. I settle down and glance up at him. The look on his face makes me shiver.

"She's _lying _to me," I tell him. He gives her an assessing look.

"He's homeless?"

Kiera pushes her lips into a straight line and then amends her previous statement, "He took me to an apartment once in an abandoned building."

Carlos gives Kiera a disappointed look and I smirk at her as smugly as possible.

"We'll find him," Carlos assures me.

"Can we go _now_?"

Carlos gives Kiera a look. "Yeah," he tells me. He picks up his leather jacket from the table and slinks into it. He helps me off the table - he insists it was necessary - after Alec lent me some boots. My shoes don't fit anymore. I look at my gun holster on the table, but it's empty.

"Where's my gun?" I ask.

Kiera and Carlos both raise their eyebrows.

"I'm a CSIS agent, I'm carrying my gun."

"You're a kid," Carlos says bluntly, "you're not going around with a handgun."

I take a deep breath and start winding up for a fight, but the look on Carlos' face reminds me of how those fights have been going since I woke up here. Not worth it. We're going to find Jason now. We'll bring him back here and then everything will go back to normal.

We make it to the car and Carlos opens the driver's side back door for me. He and Kiera both get in, and then he looks at me in the rear mirror. "Buckle up," he tells me. I roll my eyes, but oblige him. ...he doesn't seem to care that Kiera isn't wearing a seatbelt. Maybe it has something to do with that special suit she wears. If it makes a person bullet proof then it probably helps in car accidents, too.

I gotta learn more about that suit.

"You warm enough, buddy?" Carlos asks me.

"Yeah, I'm fine."

He turns the heat up anyway.

"Let me know if you get hungry," he says about five minutes later.

"Okay," I answer.

Kiera directs him to the apartment, it takes about fifteen minutes to get there. Carlos parks and then gets awkward.

"Maybe you should wait here," he says, but it's clear he isn't comfortable with me waiting in the car either now that he sees the area we're in.

"I'm going with you guys," I say in my best authoritative tone.

He gives me a reproachful look, but concedes.

"Alright," he says in a sigh.

He keeps a watch on me, I think he's worried I'll get faint again. It's hard walking up the stairs. I get tired easily and my legs seem to fight me, but other than that I'm fine. We get to the hallway and Kiera turns, "Probably best if you don't say anything. He's a little skiddish." I nod. That seems reasonable. I sure as hell don't want to scare nutjob away right now.

We get to the apartment and knock. No answer. Kiera pulls out this unnatural, futuristic tool that unlocks the door. He's not home. Fuck.

Carlos and Kiera share an uneasy look, and I know they're trying to figure out what to do with me.

"Can we drive around? Maybe he's close by," I say. I don't want to figure out what to do with me, either.

They both agree, and Kiera directs Carlos for the next two hours as we circle Vancouver. We saw a lot of things, but there was no sign of Jason. I couldn't help nodding off in the car, my body had been through a lot. I kept trying to fight to keep my eyes open, but the gentle rhythm and warmth of the car was so relaxing. I snuggled deeper into the oversized hoodie and leaned my head back. I closed my eyes and they tingled from exhaustion. I felt myself float away, knowing that I should fight to stay awake.

Someone shook me.

"Wake up, we're home," Carlos said. He had the car door open and was leaning in over me. Somehow this wasn't unnerving in the least. I unclicked my seatbelt and followed him without question. I needed to get more sleep as soon as possible.

"You keep falling asleep in the back seat like that and you might just win Kiera over," he said over his shoulder.

"She like the silence?" I joke.

"Well, I'm sure she didn't mind it," Carlos said, unlocking the door to his apartment.

What then? ...right, toy soldier in her pocket - mother of a son. Sleeping boy in the backseat. Aw, isn't that precious - she thought I was cute. And now I know how to work her. For now.

Carlos's place is impressive. Immaculately styled, overly tidy and almost feminine. ...except for the boxing posters. In the very least he was batting for both teams. This could work out. ...eventually.

"I don't have a second bedroom," he says apologetically. "You can take the bed if you want."

I make a beeline for the couch. It's closer and my eyes are drooping shut. He's talking to me again, but his voice sounds like the teacher in a Peanuts cartoon. I enjoy the warm tingle as I drift off to sleep, feeling absolutely safe right where I'm at.


	3. Chapter 3

I try and tell Gardiner to take the bed, but he's not listening. He walks straight to the couch and is out the instant he flops down on it. I hate to say it, but he's adorable. Little shit. I stand over him and shake my head; he certainly has not made life easy for Kiera and I.

He's gone out of his way to make things hard for us, even tried getting Kiera arrested and threatened my career, and I know I should hate him. But look at the little guy. Someone needs to watch out for him now. I pull his boots off and set them next to the couch - he doesn't budge. I get a spare blanket out of a side chest and cover him up and it makes him look even younger.

My cell rings, it's Kiera.

"Hey," I say, walking into my bedroom.

"I wanted to check in," she says.

"We're ok. He's asleep," I tell her. "Crazy day," I joke.

"Yea," she laughs. "Thank you for taking him."

"I didn't want to bring him back from the dead a second time." I can hear her smile again on the other end.

"You handle him surprisingly well," she jokes back, but I can tell she means it.

"This _has _made it easier to reign him in."

She snickers and then there's an awkward pause.

"About today," she says, "...it _would _be easier for us if we didn't find Jason right away."

"Would it? What's he going to be like after a good night's sleep?" That balancing act could prove even more difficult. I look out my bedroom door at Gardiner as he sleeps on my couch. "And even if it did, it doesn't make it right."

She sighs on the other end. She knows I'm right, but doesn't like it. I get that, but I didn't become a cop to twist things to my advantage. I'm a cop because I believe in doing what's right.

"You're right," she tells me after a long moment. "I don't know what I was thinking."

"You were thinking that you wanted to have at least one thing going for us." It's true, the odds are stacked against us. "And hey, maybe now that he knows what's going on he won't be such a pest."

"You really believe that?"

I look out at Gardiner again. "No," I laugh.


	4. Chapter 4

I smell coffee. And food. ...bacon, eggs...toast? God, I'm hungry.

My eyes open, and I don't know where I am. I sit up, and my body feels so light. My joints don't hurt. ...and, not that I have a problem in this area, but this is the most impressive morning glory I've had in a long time...

"I thought a good breakfast would wake you up."

Carlos.

_Shit_.

It all comes crashing back in an instant.

I jump up and I'm all limbs. I need to see my face. "Where's the bathroom?"

Carlos is calmly watching me. He points with a spatula down the hall. I take off running, bouncing off furniture and walls as I go. This younger body responds more quickly than I'm used to.

Fourteen year old me stares back at me from the mirror.

_It's true_.

I go limp.

We have to find Jason.

My heart is skipping beats and I try to keep my breathing calm. I feel like I might vomit, but I also feel like I need to run five miles. My entire body is pulsating with adrenaline. I feel dizzy, and lean over to grasp the sink counter to steady myself.

"You alright?"

I'd forgotten to close the door.

"I…" Trying to speak has jettisoned my heart into my throat, and I have to take steadying breaths.

"Did you forget?"

I laugh. This is all much harder to accept after a full night's sleep.

"Come on, you should try and eat."

I look at him as though he's insane.

"It's gonna be ok. We'll find Jason. Come on," he takes my arm in his hand and leads me to the table. He pulls out a chair and gently pushes me into it. My leg starts bobbing away, beating out a rapid rhythm. This is the worst case of nerves I've ever felt in my life.

A plate of food is set in front of me: scrambled eggs with onions and peppers, bacon, some sort of cooked tomatoes with beans and some fruit. As I look over the combination it again occurs to me that Carlos is strange. This doesn't dissuade me from diving in, though. The food is surprisingly good together, and I clean my plate before he cleans his.

"What's the plan?" I ask him.

He looks at me warily. I'm not going to like his answer.

"Well, Kiera and I have work," he starts slowly.

"We have to find Jason."

"We will," he assures me. "We'll be looking for him today."

"I want to be there."

"We can't have you tagging along. You know that."

_Tagging along? _I know he's right, but that pisses me off.

"I'm not a kid, I'm not sitting around here all day!"

"Gard...what's your first name?"

"Nick."

"Nick," Carlos nods at me like you would a suspect you're trying to friendly up to. It pisses me off even more. "…you're gonna have to help us here, bud. You know we can't bring you with us. You've been through a lot, last night you could barely walk up a staircase. Take today to rest."

"Don't use tactics on me!" I yell louder than I mean to and smack the tabletop with my hands. The surge of anger and adrenaline going through my system is shocking. I'd forgotten what adolescence was like.

"That's enough," Carlos says tightly and points at me. "You need to calm down."

I slouch in my chair and fold my arms. 'Calm down': Carlos' favorite saying. But maybe this does need another approach.

"We need to stop Liber8." I say.

He nods.

"I'm close in age to their demographic now. I could be useful. We could crack this sooner."

"_Nick_."

"You know, at some point Dillon will want a mole. Why not use me now? I'm not really a kid and I'm well trained. Much safer."

Carlos leans forward, an empathetic but firm look on his face. "No."

"Come on!" I smack the table top again. I have too much energy and have to move. I jump up from the table and knock the chair over. It clatters loudly on the tile floor.

"Sit down." Carlos says through his teeth.

I spin around. Carlos is glaring up at me. He's pissed.

I really don't want a pissed Carlos on my hands, but I'm so worked up that I'm shaking. It's gotta be the hormones or kid brain chemicals - something. My face is burning with anger, but I try to swallow it down. As I pick the chair up and it slips out of my hands and clangs on the floor, I reach for it and kick the chair out of my reach. This body is clumsy. I get so mad that I pick the chair up and right it, and start slamming it on the floor over and over. "Damn, stupid, piece…"

I see Carlos get up out of the corner of my eye, and I sit on the chair before he can reach me. For good measure, I wrap my ankles around the chair legs and get a firm grip on the seat.

Carlos leans in close, his face an inch from mine and his arms boxing me in.

"You're on my last nerve today," he says in a calm voice. "You need to change that attitude because it isn't even 7AM yet, buddy. Push me again and you won't be happy. We clear?"

I swallow and nod. Carlos looks me over and I can feel the blush creeping down my neck.

"Good," he says. He ruffles my hair and collects the dishes. I watch him clean up from breakfast.

His anger is completely gone, if was ever really there at all, and he hums while cleaning the dishes. I need to control my anger and snark around him, and so I'm worried: I've never been good at playing nice.

"I've got cable," he tells me on his way to the bathroom. "You won't be too bored."

I know this isn't true. I'm not one for sitting around even when exhausted. I flop on the couch, click on the tv and flip through channels while Carlos brushes his teeth. A thought occurs to me: Carlos has to go to the station first. If I leave when Carlos does, I'll have a head start on finding Jason. If I have a head start on finding Jason, I'll likely find him first. People are creatures of habit, and Kiera showed me last night where Jason spends his time. Things could be back to normal before lunchtime.

"There's plenty of food, help yourself when you get hungry," Carlos shrugs into his leather jacket. "But stay out of the alcohol. I know all this has gotta be rough, but explaining a drunk kid in my home as a single guy would be a problem."

That idea is funny, and I can't help but snort. "Okay."

Carlos bobs his head with an amused grin and is out the door.

I listen to his footsteps get farther away and then run to the window to watch him leave. I duck just in time. He's not stupid, he knew to glance up to see if I was watching before getting into his car. The motor starts and he pulls away, I peek out the window and watch him turn a corner.

It hits me: What if I don't find Jason?

If I don't find Jason, I need to be here when Carlos comes home. He can't know I've been out. It occurs to me that he'll probably be checking the gps on my cell, so I put it on the coffee table and then put on the boots Alec has loaned me.

The places we checked for Jason are still pretty clear in my head, I'm sure I can find my way there from here.

I'm out the door without any second thoughts. This is something I need to do. I'm not a child, I'm an adult in control of their own life. It's time to hit this hard.


End file.
